12 weeks

We're at 12 weeks now. I still haven't told my job and I'm hoping maybe I can just spring it on them in the month of february...however I think they will realize something is up. We've narrowed down some names but still haven't decided an absolute. I've decided to not tell too many people, mostly because of our experience from last time. I'm still not showing and just feel fat. Tomorrow I have a test with an ultrasound, I'm nervous and we will see how it goes.

We told!

We told my family and Paul's family this weekend. Everyone was happy. I was especially happy to not have to hide it anymore. I was VERY happy my sister was okay with all of this. I was worried because I really didn't think she wanted us to be pregnant at the same time. And, we weren't really trying so it was a surprise for everyone. I am now 5 weeks and trying really hard to not give into my cravings. I do not want to gain loads of weight again like I did with Madelyn. I just lost all that weight and now I am pregnant again! Everything is going well. Still pretty tired but not as bad as last time. Thank God for no sickness, I hated that. I'm going to try to talk my sister into blogging with me.

4 weeks

I am 4 weeks pregnant but have only known for 1 week. I still haven't told my family yet. Can't seem to find the right time. I'm not too tired and haven't really been sick, aside from the episode Monday morning. Have a job offer for teaching next year and not sure if I am going to take it. It's about a 30 minute commute and with gas the way it is and all the doctor's appointments I am about to have, I'd rather find something in Tulsa. Well, it's that or I am scared shitless. I still don't feel like I have found my place in the world and every time I get close, something throws me off. Life was easier in the past, even though I didn't think it was.

The Beginning

I've gone down this road before. Not to say none of it was enjoyable, but for the most part I was miserable. The thought of having to give up my body, mind, life...well, it sucks. However, I am hopeful this time will be different. It is starting out much the same; no money, no job, not planned. But still, it might be different. Still haven't told a lot of people yet, especially my family. They are basking in the glory of another addition.

Still looking for a job. Seems once you graduate college it would be easy to find a job. This is not the case for BA majors such as myself. I have an interview tomorrow and a baby growing inside me.